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Top 5 Places: Baltimore Porn Locations


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"HOME WANTED Adult website corp seeking shoot location. Make $250-$350 for hosting a one day (12 hrs) nude shoot at your home. See the action, and make some cash! Pre-Approval required."

When a quick-thinking staffer caught this ad in a local Baltimore paper, it got us here at the Pasquinade thinking. What makes for a good porn location? Well, we perused that same paper and found our answer.


Roland Park; Baltimore, Maryland
This three-level detached, colonial home was built in 1928, the golden age of pornography. The 4 bedrooms, 3 full baths, and 2 half baths provide ample room for getting nasty. This home also features a basement, separate dining room, living room, den/library/study/masturbation suite, and Florida/sun room. Other features include 3 fireplaces, wet bar/bar, ceiling fans, window treatments, walk-in closets, two-car garage, and patio.


Guilford; Baltimore, Maryland
With over 3,400 sq ft of porn appeal, this single level condo/townhouse has 3 bedrooms, 3 full baths, 1 half bath. Other rooms include a family room/kitchen combination, living room, living/dining room combination, den/library/study, master bedroom, master bathroom, sitting room, laundry room, and foyer. The amenities in this home are endless: intercom system, window treatments, walk-in closets, whirlpool, three-car garage, community exercise area, and easy clean-up Mexican tile in the BJ room.


Northwind Farms; Parkville, Maryland
Enjoy scenic views from this 4 bedroom, 2 bath Colonial fuck-shack. Approximately 2,612 finished sq. ft. featuring a basement, family room, separate dining room, living room, master bedroom, master bathroom, recreation/game/exercise room, and foyer. Other features include 2 fireplaces, wet bar/bar, cathedral ceilings, window treatments, walk-in closets. This home has a 2 car garage, deck. The lot is located on a cul-de-sac. The property is located on 0.53 acres and is perfect for first-time buyers and pornographers.


Guilford; Baltimore Maryland
This three level detached, colonial home built in 1916 has 5 bedrooms, 5 full baths, 1 half bath. This home has a basement. Rooms include a family room, living room, den/library/study, master bedroom, master bathroom, laundry room. Other features include eight fireplaces, ceiling fans, skylights, window treatments, walk-in closets. This home has a one-car garage. The lot is partially fenced.


Canton; Baltimore, Maryland
Feel the energy of John Waters course through this three-level, interior attached, Colonial, row condo/townhouse. Its 3 bedrooms and 3.5 baths are well suited to bestiality, incest and general debauchery. Rooms include a living room, master bedroom, 2nd master bedroom, gimp shack, and recreation/game/exercise room. Other features include 2 fireplaces, ceiling fans, whipping post, and walk-in closets. This home has a deck. The property is located on 0.03 acre(s).

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